Clueless...

I am probably one of the most clueless mothers around. Well yes I was partially responsible for their creation. I also delivered them naturally without anaesthesia of any sort and in considerable pain. After that I wasn't sure what to do with them. I mean it was fine when they were tiny babies. You had to put things at one end and clean them when they came out the other. They were basically tubes that could cry and keep you awake at nights but they were also (and this is important) very cute and so I didn't mind doing any of these things when they were small. As they grew older, however, I found my patience growing conversely shorter. Now when they are 8 and 5 , I honestly don't know how I am supposed to entertain them when they are at home. If I don't, they only watch TV which might be the bane of civilization but a boon when you have ill children or five guests for lunch and you just want to get on with your work.

During the course of a normal day, I don't really do much for the kids when they get back from school except make sure they are washed and then cook up some fresh snacks for them and then send them out to play after an hour or so. Then they play , come back , have dinner and do homework. After that its bed time - the bath and bed are handled by my husband so really its easy on normal days except for my fetish of giving them fresh food (the less packaged stuff , the better). But when they have tons of holidays or they are not feeling well, it becomes really difficult for me to get a quiet moment. I mean , can you imagine a whole day of "Don't yell at your sister!" "Don't kill your brother""Do try not to push each other down the stairs""Do you have to watch TV all day?" "Share the computer - I cannot buy one for each!!" and so on. This is interspersed with "You have been eating breakfast for an hour - its just a bowl of cereal - how long do you need??""Will you finish your lunch by tomorrow morning?" "Stop sitting on the remote!!"

I then feel guilty and volunteer to read to them - my elder one says "No, Amma!" and the little girl wants me to read fifteen books at one sitting while she repeats after me. The one who absolutely needs to master reading has no interest in it.The one who is already advanced wants to learn more! So there really isn't any point in my activities with the kids. We do have fun some of the time with the three of us dancing or fooling around but to be honest they just happen and I do not orchestrate them.

So am I a passable mother? Hard to say - I think one can learn almost anything else by reading up on it but being a good mother has to come from within - I just fumble along hoping that they grow up reasonably rich enough to afford therapy and slam their mom should they need to :-)