Price Tags

The other day, I heard a quote courtesy a short online conversation. It was by Pico Iyer from his book ‘Cuba and the Night’.  I think it goes as follows (apologies if I have gotten this wrong) - “When love is a commodity, why would anyone give it away for free?” Initially, I found myself quite irritated at that depiction of love. It is not that I believe so much in love especially the frivolous crazy version.  I have learnt along the way that it is only the non-earth shattering ordinary kind of love, the kind that signifies quiet everyday togetherness that endures and grows into something more and more beautiful as time passes. And yet I wasn’t too happy to hear of love being described as a mere commodity, an article of trade, an object with a price tag.

I told S about it while I chatted away on Skype and he surprisingly agreed that love could indeed be viewed as a commodity. He thought it was a far more practical explanation than the irrational teen view of love which completely distorts its nature. My husband has always been logical and has never lost his head or heart to anyone but the children. I mused at how two people whom I see as completely different could think of something as profound as love in an identical fashion. I argued that there were many things that could then be ascribed a price tag – how much would you pay for truth, for grace, for poise, for fidelity, for beauty? If love is an object, so are these. He said they all come at a price. Love expects certain things for it to be called ‘love’ in the commonly portrayed sense. He didn’t believe in the film or poetry version of love. Neither did my friend. According to my friend, love came at the cost of commitment if you were not married and at the cost of marriage if you found yourself in love at an inappropriate time. So the price had to be paid or if you had any sense, you would shun and ignore love, if it happens along your path in life. Paying the price was simply not worth it.

I sat in thought for a while wondering at how differently the bundle of emotions and expectations that is love could be viewed from so many angles. In my mind true love is less selfish than mere attraction, there is no such thing as a soulmate and more people in this world are fooled by an illusion of love than by any other enchantment. Does love extract some kind of payment? In many ways it does. So perhaps S was right. Perhaps my friend of twenty years knew what he was talking about for he had led a varied life unlike my mainly sheltered existence. Nothing in this life comes for free. 

The price tag for love or truth or grace isn’t monetary but if it was, I wonder what amount of money one would have to pay to be free of heartbreak or what amount would suffice to purchase grace under extremely trying circumstances. What is the value of someone’s tears? How much would you ask as reparation for being taken for granted? If you are given a great lifestyle and fancy possessions, would you forget in a trice? If you are on the verge of death, does the idea of how much money you leave behind rather than the difference you have made to a handful of lives, make death seem nicer ?Money seems quite ineffective for a few things in life but yes, for everything else, including a certain kind of ‘love’, there is always MasterCard.