Unhappy minds...

I woke up feeling inexplicably sad today. I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why. True, the last few days have been somewhat difficult but I generally bounce back quickly and therefore found it hard to believe that a few more kicks when I am down would actually get me feeling that low. Somehow I don’t think that was the reason for the overwhelming feeling of sorrow that seemed to have pervaded my being. The sorrow was not invasive though – it seemed to presage some inevitability that I had no control over but must grieve for nevertheless.

Is man’s mind while at rest, happy? Mine never is – it tends to sit quiet and pensive thinking over the nature of things instead of simply relaxing. Can any thinking being be truly happy? I somehow doubt that – one is so busy ruminating on consequences and second-guesses that the moment of living is past before one knows it and one has neither relaxed nor enjoyed the present moment before it has moved on to the past. Maybe the key is to set a goal of making your mind live in the present for just that one moment and no more – gradually it will find itself not bogged down by too many thoughts perhaps.

I have never actively tried it since I am used to the buzz and traffic of too many thoughts in an overheated brain. I also wonder whether being quiet and happy for the most part will be conducive for a writer’s imagination anyway. I mean the periods when I am relatively content, I have no urge to write whatsoever. However when I am sad, angry, frustrated or ridiculously irritated, then the words seem to flow effortlessly. Am I like the oyster that needs to be uncomfortable and in pain to be creative? I don’t imagine satisfied, eternally happy, irritation-free oysters are capable of producing pearls.

So there may be a role for the forever-restless minded like myself to play in the vast production that is day to day life in the universe. It may be that some of the finest inventions were born of restless inquiry and not of content contemplation. It may be that intense feelings of sorrow can prompt an outpouring of creativity that boggles the mind. I don’t know for sure but I am certain of one thing – unhappy minds need to be celebrated too...