It was one of those Saturdays.
I had to rush about all day. Morning saw me making breakfast, waking the two
teenagers who seem to be sleeping more than ever and left with no time to make
lunch. I ran off to various errands and meetings after telling S and the kids to
have fun. They went out to eat and shop and chill. By the time I got back at
night I was bone weary.
Too hot to sit on my
recliner, I plopped myself on the floor and closed my eyes. I was tired. I had
my period so there was no one position that I found comfortable. I had a ton of
work yet to be done and most importantly I had to teach Appu because no matter
whom I leave him with at home, no one will take the trouble to teach or read or
just play with him differently so that he can learn something new.
I wanted to curl into
a ball and lie on the floor but I bit my lip and decided to get on with it.
Mahi asked me if I was ok. I said yeah just a bit tired as moms generally are.
She got me a glass of water. I was telling my husband that I would try and make
Appu read at least a bit or I wouldn’t be able to deal with the guilt. A day
lost for him is a day I cannot replace. S told me to take a break and do it the
next day. I refused. By the time I gulped down the water, Mahi was back. She
said, “Amma, you sit right here. I’m going to read with Appu today.”
I was touched.
“Are you sure you will
have the patience baby? Its not that easy.”
“I just want to help.
I can do it Amma.”
Off went my little girl. I told her which book to pick and I sat in the living room with my
eyes closed listening to them read. It was all about giant octopuses. Appu
seemed somewhat interested. He would read and then she would read the same thing so that
he would understand how the words were pronounced. She jumped and pranced about
telling him what the words meant. She would come running to ask me how to
explain some word or the other and I would tell her. She would then go back and
add to it memories of movies, trips, other stories so that he could compare.
Appu grew more animated. He seemed at ease reading with his sister.
Forty minutes went by.
I was still on the floor. My eyes filled up as the oh-so-different voices of my
children filtered their way to my heart. I was lucky to have a daughter who set
out to help without me asking her to. I was lucky to have a son who could still
laugh his child-like belly laugh at the silliest things and who adored his kid sister. My
tiredness vanished. I got up and went to Appu’s room to see two happy faces
shout out “Finished Amma!”. Appu got his break for being cooperative and Mahi
got the biggest hug I could give her.
For some, autism is a
thing to be ashamed of and swept under the carpet. For Mahi it’s a fact to be
accepted. She may never have a brother like her other friends but she is all
the stronger for knowing that she has a brother who will love her like no
other.
